A while ago I had a conversation with a friend who runs a SaaS platform, it went something like this: 

Him: “Man, most of these homepages sound exactly the same. It’s just meaningless jargon for the most part.”

I laughed and said “Yeah it’s awful, yesterday I spent 5 minutes reading this website and I still have no clue what they do.” 

And that’s exactly the point. 

The good news is, having boring competition is one of the best things you can hope for in business. I’m not saying you should be lazy… but when everyone else bores people to death, that makes standing out much easier. 

The few who cut the crap, focus on the problem and make a great offer are the ones who stand out. They get noticed and stick in people’s heads. That’s who everyone wants to buy from. 

Or… as Macho Man Randy Savage famously said “The cream… rises… to the top!!” 

The bad news is, if your homepage all buzzwords and empty phrases… you’ll be forgotten too. 

If your don’t understand what you’re offering, I can help. Check my calendar, book a call. Link below.. 

There’s a pattern that I see 4-5 times per week in my inbox. 

Maybe it’s the new guru trend, or some lazy AI tactic. 

I don’t really know, or care. You can do what you want. 

Personally, it turns me off… and I doubt it converts very well. 

Here’s how the message goes: 

“Hey, here’s a generic observation about you. Are you interested in hiring me?”

I imagine the point is to seem conversational, and not sound like you’re sending the same DM to everyone. But it doesn’t do either of those things. 

Have you ever heard of the dead internet theory? 

It’s an idea that nobody actually uses the internet anymore and it’s populated by bots who recycle the same content endlessly. These types of messages give me that sort of “dead internet” vibe.

Moving on. 

I rarely do cold outreach, but when I do… I have a pretty good response rate. For the last decade I’ve kept my secret method locked up in a vault guarded by tigers. But now. Right now. For the first time ever… I’m going to reveal it publically. 

I call it:

“Level 99 Trillion Dollar Pan-Galactic Supreme Sales Emperor Cold Outreach Opener Mega Hack”

Ready? Here it is.

“Sup dude” 

That’s literally it. 

Why? Two reasons. 

First. That’s how I talk. It’s natural for me. 

Second. Since the only time that I ever cold DM people is if I notice a specific problem that I can possibly help them with, the offer builds itself. 

Imagine you’re walking through a park. 

You see someone struggling to set up a folding picnic table. 

You probably wouldn’t say “Hey, I love your picnic. I have helped 23 people set up their picnic this year. Do you want to buy a sandwich?”

The more likely scenario: “Ahhh man, these tables are tricky. Want a hand with that?”

Annnd… there you have it. That’s the whole “hack”.  It’s really that simple.

Be yourself. Offer to help solve a problem. 

EZ PZ.

Check my calendar if you want help with your business problems. Link below.

If you’re the type of business owner who obsesses over branding, products, and logos instead of obsessing over your market, have I got a story for yoooou. 

Once upon a time, I JV’d an ecom brand in the hemp niche. We scaled from a single bedroom to a large warehouse and $5M revenue the first year. 

Long story short… we were hitting $450k/month and everything looked amazing on paper. Until it didn’t. Over a four month period, revenue plummeted below $75k. 

 My (correct) opinion why:

 It wasn’t the product. It wasn’t the logo.

 It was the audience, and chaos. My partner insisted on “rebranding” every other month with new websites and logos. Customers were confused. Confused people don’t buy.

 That’s the 40-40-20 rule in action, coined in the 1960’s by Ed Mayer and then popularized by Dan Kennedy. 

 Here’s the idea…

 40% list: Choose the right audience and curate your list. If they jump on bandwagons or are impossible to please, cut them.

 40% offer: Make it clear. Mixed messages kill the sale. 

 20% creatives: Brilliant copy and pretty packages can’t save you from a bad list. 

 Markets are fickle. Focus your efforts on who actually matters. Second, nail your positioning. And then worry whether your logo is the right shade of yellow. 

I’ve got a few spots on my calendar coming up for emails, then I’m probably booked up for the next month. 

 Spots go quick. 

“If you can’t explain it simply, you don’t understand it well enough.” — Albert Einstein

I never met ol’ Albert so I couldn’t tell you for certain if he actually said that ever, but that quote is commonly attributed to him.

Here’s a similar, more modern version that my 9 year old (who I have met), loves to say whenever I’m rambling…

“Put the fries in the bag!”

i.e, Get to the point!!

Those two ideas carry the same energy. And they both highlight something that business owners should do, if they want to make more money by doing less work. 

We’ll get to what that “something” is in a moment. 

Before that, here’s a fun example. 

Infomercials.

These things sell billions by sticking to one clear formula: show the problem, show the solution, repeat. They don’t tell “brand stories” or bother complicating anything at all. 

In fact, they do the opposite.

When I was a kid, my younger sister swiped our moms credit card from her purse and ordered some art supplies from the TV. 

All she needed to know was what a credit card was and how to use a phone. By making it so dumb-simple to order their products, a 5 year old was able to buy! 

And that’s the point for today. Stop obsessing over clever funnels and fancy branding. Put the fries in the bag.

Confusing your prospects by having too many steps in your sales funnel kills your business. And having a complicated or unclear offer doesn’t make you look clever, it breaks trust and weakens your position. 

Because if a 5-year old can follow an infomercial and commit identity theft, but your prospects can’t understand how to buy from you, you’re doomed. 

If you want help to clarify your offer, and make it impossible for the right audience to say “no.” then check my calendar and book a free call.